Preparing for another walk…

“Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature’s peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves.” -John Muir

Last year, my feet took my on a journey that changed my life forever. I walked the John Muir Trail expecting a good vacation, some time away, and some beautiful memories. I got those things and so much more. During this walk I discovered a passion so deep and so strong I felt I could overcome the wind, the waves, the tallest mountains. My heart soared, my body thrived, my mind screamed with the notion that I was doing exactly what I was made to be doing. My place had been found. I was free, perfect, complete. I was alive.

Then, my trip was over. Heartbreak set in. The winter in rainy Oregon took me through another roller coaster of depression, confusion, and loss. I searched, and searched, and searched for that feeling again. It was still in there inside of me…Somewhere…But WHERE?! Why couldn’t I find it? Why couldn’t I re-create it? Why did I suddenly feel like I was floating through the motions but life was abstinent again? Time passed, my heart healed, and I once again felt like I was living a “normal” life. Ahhhh yes. My comfort zone. But why would I want normal? Why would I want comfort?

This July, actually, 12 days from now, I will be heading out on the Colorado Trail for another journey of finding myself. 500+ miles of freedom. Anticipation is building, excitement is exploding! My heart will be full again! My mind will be fresh! My legs will be strong! My skin and hair, withered. My body, tired. But oh, the BLISS! I have expectation, but not too much. For each trip, each day, each moment, will bring something different than the last. What do you have in store for me, Colorado?

My list of “things-to-do” is dwindling. Food is ready, gear is set out, last minute items are arriving in the mail. But there is still so much to do! I am nervous. I am thrilled. My heart is jumping out of my chest. And now I wait. 12 days left!